Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I can't turn off my feet"
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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