You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
