i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
