Its about making memories worth repressing
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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