Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize