You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize