But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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