dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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