Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize