So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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