did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
