1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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