Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
