i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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