sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
