oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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