Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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