from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
