Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
