Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize