yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
