No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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