Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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