I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
