i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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