? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
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