why didn't you poke me back
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
