omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
