OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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