There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
