I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
