3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
