My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
