I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
