You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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