I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
