I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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