garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
