Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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