I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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