I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
