I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
nutella sex= disaster
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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