That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize