I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
