therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
