He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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