if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize