just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
