the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
