i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
