I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
